I was challenged today by my pastor to rethink my view on sacrifice. I guess for my whole life I'd assumed that a sacrifice was something you just did because you wanted to accomplish a goal in your life. It seemed to me to be something you just grit your teeth and do. Most of the time I wasn't happy about doing it, I just wanted to see something happen.
But as a Christ follower, what does it really mean to sacrifice? Is it this same idea --- we do it because we're supposed to, so we can please God or achieve some other spiritual goal? It's hard therefore it must be spiritual. Seems like I've mostly achieved feeling resentful about the sacrifice. Have you ever felt that way?
Well, my pastor painted me a picture of true sacrifice as having been done out of love not fear. He challenged me to think about how often I am actually willing to sacrifice something, not out of guilt or shame, but because I am truely thankful for what God has done and/or who God is in my life. When's the last time I WANTED to sacrifice something? I don't honestly know the answer to that question. I like to think I sacrifice for my family and for my ministry without expecting something back, that I am giving out of the goodness of my heart, but upon reflection I don't know if that's always the case. I think there is still a part of me that wants my sacrifice to be recognized, how much I'm giving up, how hard it is for me, so that it will be properly appreciated. I wonder how often I do this to God? --- "Lord, look at all the stuff I'm giving up for you, I hope you're keeping track because it's really hard and I'd like to get some extra credit here!"
I was really convicted by my pastor's challenge to view a sacrifice as something I'm willing to give up, not guilted into or coerced, but actually glad to do it. Not afraid that if I don't I'll lose credit with God. I'd like to think that sometimes I do this, for my family and for God. I guess my prayer is that I will do it more and more, "for the joy set before me", right?
Lord, help me to serve, love, and sacrifice as You do.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Do You Enjoy God?
I'm reading this book called Follow Me by Jan David Hettinga. He is writing about discipleship and what it means to follow Christ. He begins by describing what kind of a leader God is and then moves into why we tend to rebel. After explaining the kind of leader Christ is, he stops and asks a few questions for meditation. I was particularly struck by this one:
--- Do you enjoy God? Have you found Him to be approachable, likable, lovable? Do you appreciate the safety of His humility?
I don't know if I've really considered any of these questions lately. My walk lately has felt more like a march, one foot after the other, keepin' on keeping on. I don't know the last time I stopped to see whether or not God was approachable or likable, I guess I've been too busy "working". Why is that? I serve a God that is gentle and humble in heart, who promises rest for my soul, who says He'll never leave me or forsake me. I guess the next question must be, do I believe that? As Hettinga says, do I appreciate the safety of His humility? In short, probably not. I am stuck in the mindset that leaders serve their own ends, they go after their own agendas, why in the world would I trust them with my innermost thoughts or feelings much less my brokenness? Isn't that weakness? Won't that get me in trouble, or at least send me down a couple rungs on the ladder? Those are some of the thoughts and questions that inevitably run through my mind...
But when I read about Jesus, when I hear His words in the gospels, something in my heart begins to beat faster and compels me to move closer. I must admit there is this powerful urge to step in close, like the bleeding woman, and just touch the hem of his cloak. Even that, I believe, even that would heal me, would satisfy my deepest desire. There is this overwhelming desire to just blurt it all out, all my fears, my hurts, my hopes, all the things that I lie in bed at night going over and over in my mind. So, maybe I do appreciate the safety of His humility, perhaps I just don't take advantage of it enough.
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
The Lifeboat
I recently finished a book called "Searching for God Knows What" by Donald Miller. You may have read his other book, Blue Like Jazz, or maybe never heard of him at all. Anyway, I was really challenged by several things he said in this book and I'd highly recommend it to anyone who's wondering about God questions and what life is about.
My wife is a middle school counselor and I was laughing with her about a couple remarks he has about his life as a middle-schooler. He described an interesting conversation his teacher led in class one day. It was an exercise in ethics and she presented the topic like this: (paraphrase of his words of her words) "There are 6 people in a lifeboat. (I don't remember the 6 so I'll make them up) A lawyer, a doctor, a librarian, a musician, a janitor, and an unemployed person. There is only room for 5 in the boat and if you don't toss someone out, the boat will sink and everyone will die. Who do you think should get tossed out?"
Miller recounts at the time how the class offered up different people to walk the plank and how there were reasons for why each person should go. He goes on to talk about how though it was only an exercise in class, he could see how it was much more descriptive of life than the teacher probably imagined. Even at such a young age he could articulate what the "lifeboat" mentality looked like in his school. As he grew the mentality didn't fade away, it just grew stronger but less overt. There is this whole social structure that is invisible, no one ever talks about it or refers to it, it's kind of this unwritten code that we all get indoctrinated in from an early age, probably late elemenatary or early middle school, and it lasts the rest of our lives.
I know exactly what he is talking about. I can remember in school that there were always the cool people, the loners, the jocks, the preps, the stoners, and the outcasts. Again, most of this was not verbalized among students, but it was definitely lived by, myself included.
Miller argues that this code has been around since the begining of time, as a consequence of the fall. He says that Adam and Eve were once in a place where their identity was so fulfilled through their relationship to God that they walked around naked and didn't even realize it. But after the fall, the first thing they did instinctively was cover up. No longer was the issue of identity clear and fulfilled, now it was in question. Miller then talks about how Jesus came and completed violated all the unwritten rules of this code when he walked the earth. He looked around and saw these people living by this foolish standard of trying to prove to other people why they shouldn't be tossed out of the boat. Their whole lives were centered around staying at the top of the ladder, constantly proving their worth in the boat. Jesus comes along and says that not only is this a waste of time, there is no boat to be tossed out of in the first place. Each and every person is loved by God for he/she was created in His image. The question of God fulfilling our identity was not missing, it's just that now there's competition.
I've been thinking about this a lot this past week. How much of my life have I wasted trying to prove to myself or others that I am worthy to stay in the boat? This is such a powerful urge in me that I also catch myself trying to prove to God why I should be worthy of His grace and love. Jesus says, "So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matt 6:31-33).
It's amazing to me that Christians like myself, who don't really understand the call of Christ, end up spending our lives running after the very things the pagans, those who don't know Christ, run after. That is really a sobering thought. Makes me wonder if this is part of what Jesus meant when he said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. "
My wife is a middle school counselor and I was laughing with her about a couple remarks he has about his life as a middle-schooler. He described an interesting conversation his teacher led in class one day. It was an exercise in ethics and she presented the topic like this: (paraphrase of his words of her words) "There are 6 people in a lifeboat. (I don't remember the 6 so I'll make them up) A lawyer, a doctor, a librarian, a musician, a janitor, and an unemployed person. There is only room for 5 in the boat and if you don't toss someone out, the boat will sink and everyone will die. Who do you think should get tossed out?"
Miller recounts at the time how the class offered up different people to walk the plank and how there were reasons for why each person should go. He goes on to talk about how though it was only an exercise in class, he could see how it was much more descriptive of life than the teacher probably imagined. Even at such a young age he could articulate what the "lifeboat" mentality looked like in his school. As he grew the mentality didn't fade away, it just grew stronger but less overt. There is this whole social structure that is invisible, no one ever talks about it or refers to it, it's kind of this unwritten code that we all get indoctrinated in from an early age, probably late elemenatary or early middle school, and it lasts the rest of our lives.
I know exactly what he is talking about. I can remember in school that there were always the cool people, the loners, the jocks, the preps, the stoners, and the outcasts. Again, most of this was not verbalized among students, but it was definitely lived by, myself included.
Miller argues that this code has been around since the begining of time, as a consequence of the fall. He says that Adam and Eve were once in a place where their identity was so fulfilled through their relationship to God that they walked around naked and didn't even realize it. But after the fall, the first thing they did instinctively was cover up. No longer was the issue of identity clear and fulfilled, now it was in question. Miller then talks about how Jesus came and completed violated all the unwritten rules of this code when he walked the earth. He looked around and saw these people living by this foolish standard of trying to prove to other people why they shouldn't be tossed out of the boat. Their whole lives were centered around staying at the top of the ladder, constantly proving their worth in the boat. Jesus comes along and says that not only is this a waste of time, there is no boat to be tossed out of in the first place. Each and every person is loved by God for he/she was created in His image. The question of God fulfilling our identity was not missing, it's just that now there's competition.
I've been thinking about this a lot this past week. How much of my life have I wasted trying to prove to myself or others that I am worthy to stay in the boat? This is such a powerful urge in me that I also catch myself trying to prove to God why I should be worthy of His grace and love. Jesus says, "So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matt 6:31-33).
It's amazing to me that Christians like myself, who don't really understand the call of Christ, end up spending our lives running after the very things the pagans, those who don't know Christ, run after. That is really a sobering thought. Makes me wonder if this is part of what Jesus meant when he said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. "
Thursday, July 21, 2005
A much needed getaway...
It's been about 6 years since I've been up to the New Mexico mountains. As a child I would come here at least twice a year with my family. Once in the summer and then once in the winter when we could snow ski. We traveled up here for a little vacation, some R&R before the Fall hits with a vengence. The weather is gorgeous, daytime is in the 70s, nighttime in the low 50s. Very different from the 100 degree weather of Austin.
We got up about 7am this morning, mostly because we couldn't sleep any later and Gabe was up and ready to face the day. Outside the sun was shining and we could see the wind dancing through the leaves of the Aspen tree just outside our front door. What a beautiful thing to wake up to.
We went into town to do the grocery store run, always a fun adventure. Gabe is always getting tons of attention and flirting with as many girls as possible, his PawPaw would've been proud. Afterwards it was back home for a nap and then dinner. Aren't vacations the best?!
I was thinking about our friends who arrived in their new home out in California today. I am so excited for this new stage in their lives, I know God has much in store for them. But I must also confess, I miss them already. It's only been 1 day since they left and yet it feels like it's been longer. I wish that they didn't have to leave and I've been wishing lately that I didn't love them so much, it only makes it that much harder. To be totally honest though, I wouldn't trade one minute of the last 5 years with them. I believe that part of the beauty of community is knowing and being known, loving and being loved, celebrating and being celebrated, and I can say without one doubt that I shared this with my friends. Thanks Brad and Linn for being such wonderful friends to me and my family, we love and miss you and look forward to being with you again soon!
We got up about 7am this morning, mostly because we couldn't sleep any later and Gabe was up and ready to face the day. Outside the sun was shining and we could see the wind dancing through the leaves of the Aspen tree just outside our front door. What a beautiful thing to wake up to.
We went into town to do the grocery store run, always a fun adventure. Gabe is always getting tons of attention and flirting with as many girls as possible, his PawPaw would've been proud. Afterwards it was back home for a nap and then dinner. Aren't vacations the best?!
I was thinking about our friends who arrived in their new home out in California today. I am so excited for this new stage in their lives, I know God has much in store for them. But I must also confess, I miss them already. It's only been 1 day since they left and yet it feels like it's been longer. I wish that they didn't have to leave and I've been wishing lately that I didn't love them so much, it only makes it that much harder. To be totally honest though, I wouldn't trade one minute of the last 5 years with them. I believe that part of the beauty of community is knowing and being known, loving and being loved, celebrating and being celebrated, and I can say without one doubt that I shared this with my friends. Thanks Brad and Linn for being such wonderful friends to me and my family, we love and miss you and look forward to being with you again soon!
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
The Birthday Boy
Today Gabe turns 1 year old. I can't believe it! My wife and I were just thinking about how strange it is sometimes to look down and see this precious little boy and know that he is ours! I wonder if this feeling ever goes away or if it continues to show up at each new stage in life. I think about my parents and all that they have seen in the 35 years that my siblings and I have been around, and I wonder what is yet to come in my own family.
I think too of what my mom shared with me after Gabe was born. She said that when you experience having a child you see and understand your relationship to God in a new way, a deeper way. He gives you a window into understanding how He feels about you, how He sees you and all the potential and hopes and dreams. What an amazing and awesome experience.
And now a year later, I can hardly imagine what life would be like without him. I can only liken it a little to being married --- I can't really remember what my life was like before I met Kaley. I mean I remember stuff but most of it's hazy, that is until she walked into my life. From that time on it seems like so much has come into focus. I love being married and I love being a dad, what an amazing thing!
Son, I know you can't read yet but one day soon you will. I look forward to that day, but not at the expense of the ones I have with you now. I am so proud of you and love you more than words can express, and that I can promise will NEVER change. I pray that your first birthday will be one of many to come filled with joy and hope and the anticipation of the life God has set before you.
Father, thank you for your Son, and thank you for my son. May he grow to know the love his mom and I have for him, but even greater than that, may he know the love that You have for him!
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
What a difference a month makes...
It's been awhile since my last post. A lot has happened since May 23rd. My wife and I both passed the 30 year old birthday milestone and my son is getting ready to pass his first. I also experienced my first Father's Day as a father. It's also been neat to see God working in the lives of folks all around me. I was just reading the blog of a friend of mine who lives in NYC. His newborn son has had and still has many health problems. He's been in the NICU for over 2 months, and probably has at least another 2 to go. My friend Joe was recounting the gracious act of their neighbors who over the course of this past month raised money to send he and his wife on a weekend excursion in the city. What an awesome example of the hands of Christ reaching out to bless!
It got me wondering how much I miss on a daily basis -- how often does Jesus walk by and I don't notice? Or do I walk by him and totally miss it? What experience am I having right now that a week from now I'll look back and wonder why I wasn't paying attention? I guess some of this is only seen in hindsight, but I hope and pray that God will continue to open my eyes to what He's doing.
It got me wondering how much I miss on a daily basis -- how often does Jesus walk by and I don't notice? Or do I walk by him and totally miss it? What experience am I having right now that a week from now I'll look back and wonder why I wasn't paying attention? I guess some of this is only seen in hindsight, but I hope and pray that God will continue to open my eyes to what He's doing.
Monday, May 23, 2005
Been out on the lake lately?
Today I had a great conversation with my dad. We spent a little while at an Austin coffee shop talking about our hopes and dreams and what things we'd like to see happen in the future. We spoke about the state of the Church, how it is affecting and relating to the culture, and what really it means to follow Jesus. All this in an hour or so, pretty impressive huh?
He related a story about a recent trip he took down to Mexico where he and a few other served a local church there by helping them renovate and restore their building. It was run down and in need of a large dose of tlc. My dad was struck by the genuine faith of the people there, how they relied so much and how they trusted so deeply in God for daily provision. We spoke about how it sometimes feels that we can pretty much live most of our life and not need to trust in God for provision. We have good jobs, we can have most anything we want, we don't worry about where our next meal will come from. It presents such a radical choice to Christ --- why do we need Jesus if we can provide everything for ourselves? Unfortunately the church has not done a very good job of showing why. Perhaps we've forgotten, perhaps I've forgotten, what He means to us, maybe we, I, never really knew in the first place. Mostly we come to God with a personal or other crisis, but between those times it's business as usual.
These words of Christ came to mind as I was reflecting on our conversation:
"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:21
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." Matthew 6:24
The wisdome found in these words is amazing. Our culture has sold us so subtly on this it's not even funny; in fact it's rather scary. I can see in myself how often I rely on my own abilities to provide and take care of myself, my wife, and my son. I don't think about it as serving money, I think about it as providing for my family. Now, I am not saying we shouldn't work hard, I'm just saying do we ever do anything by faith anymore? Do we ever step out in a direction in which the only way that things will work out is if God provides, or do we hang close to shore, keeping our arms and legs inside the ride at all times? Do we demonstrate our faith in God by giving sacrificially, trusting that he knows what we need and will provide or do we continually store up for a rainy day? Or reaching out to someone in need, trusting that even though we don't have all the answers we know the One who does? (By the way, if you don't like the questions I'm asking, stay out of Matthew 6).
I'm convinced, at least for myself, that this lack of trust keeps me inside the boat most of the time I'm with Jesus. Unfortunately that's not where the action is. To borrow a line from a favorite author of mine, if you're going to walk on water, you've got to get out of the boat.
Lord, increase my faith, increase my trust, give me the courage to follow you out onto the water.
He related a story about a recent trip he took down to Mexico where he and a few other served a local church there by helping them renovate and restore their building. It was run down and in need of a large dose of tlc. My dad was struck by the genuine faith of the people there, how they relied so much and how they trusted so deeply in God for daily provision. We spoke about how it sometimes feels that we can pretty much live most of our life and not need to trust in God for provision. We have good jobs, we can have most anything we want, we don't worry about where our next meal will come from. It presents such a radical choice to Christ --- why do we need Jesus if we can provide everything for ourselves? Unfortunately the church has not done a very good job of showing why. Perhaps we've forgotten, perhaps I've forgotten, what He means to us, maybe we, I, never really knew in the first place. Mostly we come to God with a personal or other crisis, but between those times it's business as usual.
These words of Christ came to mind as I was reflecting on our conversation:
"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:21
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." Matthew 6:24
The wisdome found in these words is amazing. Our culture has sold us so subtly on this it's not even funny; in fact it's rather scary. I can see in myself how often I rely on my own abilities to provide and take care of myself, my wife, and my son. I don't think about it as serving money, I think about it as providing for my family. Now, I am not saying we shouldn't work hard, I'm just saying do we ever do anything by faith anymore? Do we ever step out in a direction in which the only way that things will work out is if God provides, or do we hang close to shore, keeping our arms and legs inside the ride at all times? Do we demonstrate our faith in God by giving sacrificially, trusting that he knows what we need and will provide or do we continually store up for a rainy day? Or reaching out to someone in need, trusting that even though we don't have all the answers we know the One who does? (By the way, if you don't like the questions I'm asking, stay out of Matthew 6).
I'm convinced, at least for myself, that this lack of trust keeps me inside the boat most of the time I'm with Jesus. Unfortunately that's not where the action is. To borrow a line from a favorite author of mine, if you're going to walk on water, you've got to get out of the boat.
Lord, increase my faith, increase my trust, give me the courage to follow you out onto the water.
Sunday, May 22, 2005
A God who never sleeps...
I was thinking tonight about the begining of my week. First of all, I am NOT a morning person, which my son happens to be! Every morning at the crack of 5:30am, Gabe wakes up and beckons my wife and I to join him in his blissful joy as he greets the morning (or at least to get him out of his crib!). I struggle to get out of bed without running into something until I get my contacts in. Most every morning my precious wife gets up with him which allows me to sleep a little longer. I have tried getting up a few times lately because the morning is often Gabe's best time of the day and usually my only time with him all day. Because of a hectic work schedule he's typically down for bed by the time I get home, so mornings are an important time for dad & son. But I must confess, more often than not I give in to the need for sleep, or if I do happen to get up, it's usually with one eye open and me still half asleep. Thus, Gabe doesn't always get the full daddy experience.
I was also reading tonight Psalm 121:
I lift up my eyes to the hills — where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip — he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you — the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm — he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
I was reminded that I serve a God who never sleeps or slumbers, He doesn't get up in the morning to kind of listen to me with one eye open and one closed, wishing he could get just 10 more minutes of good deep sleep. Instead He is always fully awake, listening and watching over His precious ones. What a joy it is to know that our God doesn't get groggy and grumpy from lack of sleep, instead He is always like my son is each morning, fully alive and ready to engage with us in relationship! Thank you Lord for being my help each day, for watching over me as I come and go both now and forever. I love you!
I was also reading tonight Psalm 121:
I lift up my eyes to the hills — where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip — he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you — the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm — he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
I was reminded that I serve a God who never sleeps or slumbers, He doesn't get up in the morning to kind of listen to me with one eye open and one closed, wishing he could get just 10 more minutes of good deep sleep. Instead He is always fully awake, listening and watching over His precious ones. What a joy it is to know that our God doesn't get groggy and grumpy from lack of sleep, instead He is always like my son is each morning, fully alive and ready to engage with us in relationship! Thank you Lord for being my help each day, for watching over me as I come and go both now and forever. I love you!
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
How do you smell?
Opinions. We all have them. It's funny to me how we pick and choose the things that we'll get upset and fight about, especially when it comes to the church. We get really mad at folks that want to bring in certain changes, but then others seem to be no problem. Why is that? Why do we pick and choose?
I think sometimes it has to do with our experience and how we grow up. How open to change were our parents? How willing were they to entertain different ideas and explore new things? Some of it is definitely comfort, how much does this change pull me out of my comfort zone. I guess some is education and maturity, how often do we sit at Jesus' feet and allow him to teach us, grow us, transform our hearts.
There is a woman at my church who is a spiritual hero of mine. Over the course of her life she's suffered the loss of two husbands through death, a number of family heartbreaks, along with other disappointments, and yet when you talk with her now she is so peaceful and full of grace. When changes occur, she does not react with harshness or angry words of fear, but instead welcomes conversation and always goes back to love. She is to me the epitomy of Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 4:16 --
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."
Everyday my friend is drawn closer to the heart of God, and the aroma of Christ that exudes from her grows sweeter and sweeter by the hour. I hope to one day smell half as sweet as she.
I think sometimes it has to do with our experience and how we grow up. How open to change were our parents? How willing were they to entertain different ideas and explore new things? Some of it is definitely comfort, how much does this change pull me out of my comfort zone. I guess some is education and maturity, how often do we sit at Jesus' feet and allow him to teach us, grow us, transform our hearts.
There is a woman at my church who is a spiritual hero of mine. Over the course of her life she's suffered the loss of two husbands through death, a number of family heartbreaks, along with other disappointments, and yet when you talk with her now she is so peaceful and full of grace. When changes occur, she does not react with harshness or angry words of fear, but instead welcomes conversation and always goes back to love. She is to me the epitomy of Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 4:16 --
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."
Everyday my friend is drawn closer to the heart of God, and the aroma of Christ that exudes from her grows sweeter and sweeter by the hour. I hope to one day smell half as sweet as she.
Thursday, May 5, 2005
No Substitue for Experience
I was talking with a friend over lunch today who serves in ministry here in Austin. I was inspired by something he's doing --- on his day off he's substitute teaching at the high school where most of his students attend. We were talking about how most of the spiritual formation process in church today happens at the head level and rarely does it make it down to our hearts. The experience of faith has been overshadowed by the knowledge of faith. It reminded me of a couple things I'd read earlier this week:
"Jesus facilitated spiritual formation in his disciples by introducing them to life situations and then helping them debrief their experiences."
Reggie McNeal --- This Present Future
"...we have several challenges to meet. First, we must re-train our vision so that we can recognize the reign of God. This means sitting at the feet of the one who first recognized and announced the nearness of the kingdom. This means we should know Jesus better than we know Paul. I trust Paul wouldn't have it any other way."
Katie Hayes --- Evangelism as Companionship (The Gospel in Culture 14: 3/4)
I am struck that when it comes to Paul's words, most of what we talk about and dwell on falls somewhere in the doctrinal arena. However, we quickly, or at least I quickly gloss over Paul's goal in all his writings: pointing to Christ! Paul's focus in all that he says, all that he is about, everything he does, it's all designed to point back to Christ. So, why don't I spend more time looking where Paul pointed?
I guess the reality is it's easier to learn something than to live something. When you look at Christ, what you see is faith lived out. Jesus never just leaves it at the head level, he always pushes to the heart, he moves you to experience, just like his disciples. To understand Paul we have to understand Jesus, we must know him not just in our mind, but in the experience of our lives.
"Jesus facilitated spiritual formation in his disciples by introducing them to life situations and then helping them debrief their experiences."
Reggie McNeal --- This Present Future
"...we have several challenges to meet. First, we must re-train our vision so that we can recognize the reign of God. This means sitting at the feet of the one who first recognized and announced the nearness of the kingdom. This means we should know Jesus better than we know Paul. I trust Paul wouldn't have it any other way."
Katie Hayes --- Evangelism as Companionship (The Gospel in Culture 14: 3/4)
I am struck that when it comes to Paul's words, most of what we talk about and dwell on falls somewhere in the doctrinal arena. However, we quickly, or at least I quickly gloss over Paul's goal in all his writings: pointing to Christ! Paul's focus in all that he says, all that he is about, everything he does, it's all designed to point back to Christ. So, why don't I spend more time looking where Paul pointed?
I guess the reality is it's easier to learn something than to live something. When you look at Christ, what you see is faith lived out. Jesus never just leaves it at the head level, he always pushes to the heart, he moves you to experience, just like his disciples. To understand Paul we have to understand Jesus, we must know him not just in our mind, but in the experience of our lives.
Tuesday, May 3, 2005
Band of Brothers
What a blessing it is to know and be known. I have a group of guys that I meet with each week. We've committed to pray for one another, to share life with one another, and to challenge each other to become more like Christ. I am so thankful that God has brought these guys into my life and given me a place where I can take my life to God. Lord, thanks for your continued faithfulness and for working through others to make your presence known to me. I love you and I love my brothers in Christ!
Monday, May 2, 2005
Taking Life to God
I have been reading a book lately, This Present Future, and struggling with its implications on my life. I am being challenged to rethink my vision of church and what exactly it is I am calling my college students to give their lives for. Is it to become really good church members who do a lot of good church work, or is there something else I should be casting before them? In my reading I came across this quote:
"Helping people grow, particularly in the arena of spiritual formation, is about unpacking life: challenging our emotional responses that are destructive (envy, hatred, bitterness); challenging our biases (racial prejudice, social and economic elitism, intellectual snobbery); challenging our assumptions ("my needs are the most important"); challenging our responses; unpacking our frustrations, our hopes, our dreams, and our disappointments; bringing life to God rather than teaching about God, somehow hoping to get him into our lives."
I really love the idea of taking our lives to God, taking our struggles and fears, our joys and brokenness, and allowing God a firsthand chance to work in us rather than just talk about God and hope that somehow He shows up. I know that in my own experience, I often leave God stuck in places where I can see and understand, in my head where I can be rational and logical about Him, and often leave out the mystical, experiential part, the heart part of my faith. I hope that the students I work with will see me grow in my ability to take my life to God and to show them how to take theirs to him as well.
"Helping people grow, particularly in the arena of spiritual formation, is about unpacking life: challenging our emotional responses that are destructive (envy, hatred, bitterness); challenging our biases (racial prejudice, social and economic elitism, intellectual snobbery); challenging our assumptions ("my needs are the most important"); challenging our responses; unpacking our frustrations, our hopes, our dreams, and our disappointments; bringing life to God rather than teaching about God, somehow hoping to get him into our lives."
I really love the idea of taking our lives to God, taking our struggles and fears, our joys and brokenness, and allowing God a firsthand chance to work in us rather than just talk about God and hope that somehow He shows up. I know that in my own experience, I often leave God stuck in places where I can see and understand, in my head where I can be rational and logical about Him, and often leave out the mystical, experiential part, the heart part of my faith. I hope that the students I work with will see me grow in my ability to take my life to God and to show them how to take theirs to him as well.
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Remembering a friend...
Today marked the one year anniversary of the death of a good friend's father. Mark, just wanted you to know that I love you and am praying for you today, may God bless you with his peace and comfort.
NICU Reunion
Today was the reunion party for the NICU where my son was for about 11 days. It is hard to believe that he was once about 6 lbs and fighting for his little life when you see him today, 26 lbs and full of life and smiles! It's awesome to see how God works in amazing ways, He is so faithful.
I was reminded of this especially as we got to see one of the nurses who cared for Gabe while in the hospital. I can remember how scared Kaley and I were and how blessed we were to have a woman named Geannie to take care of Gabe. She was one of the first nurses Kaley got a chance to talk with, and she was so loving and tender with Gabe, and patiently answered every single question Kaley and I had, and believe me, there were plenty. What a blessing it was to have someone who could comfort us and help us understand all that was happening, she really held our hands and walked with us down a long dark road.
Just another reminder of how God works all the time, even when we can't see him, He is there comforting and loving us through the arms of His people. I am so thankful for the men and women who serve so faithfully and patiently in the NICU.
I was reminded of this especially as we got to see one of the nurses who cared for Gabe while in the hospital. I can remember how scared Kaley and I were and how blessed we were to have a woman named Geannie to take care of Gabe. She was one of the first nurses Kaley got a chance to talk with, and she was so loving and tender with Gabe, and patiently answered every single question Kaley and I had, and believe me, there were plenty. What a blessing it was to have someone who could comfort us and help us understand all that was happening, she really held our hands and walked with us down a long dark road.
Just another reminder of how God works all the time, even when we can't see him, He is there comforting and loving us through the arms of His people. I am so thankful for the men and women who serve so faithfully and patiently in the NICU.
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
Happy Birthday Gary
Today is my brother's birthday. Hard to believe that a year has gone by so fast, a lot has happened. I hope you've had a great day and looking forward to seeing you soon. Gabe says Hello! Love you man, have a very Happy Birthday!
A New Beginning
Well, something new for me today. I have seen many of my friends give this a try and have really enjoyed reading their thoughts, comments, and questions about life, so I figured I would give it a try. I have been thinking about a lot of things lately, how God has been working in my life through experiences and conversations I've had lately, and I think this will be a great way to try to process them. So, here goes.
I have been reading a book lately entitled This Present Future by a guy named Reggie McNeal. He talks about the shift from a comsumer church to a missional church. He challenges much of what the institutional church has prescribed to, a "if you build it they will come" mentality, which he argues pulls us further away not closer towards God's kingdom work. In fact he states that this model of church will die over the course of the next 20 years or so, and so to will the institutional church, if we don't make some serious changes.
Lately I have been feeling God working on my heart when it comes to some of these issues. A part of my faith has long been tied to the "do church really well and folks will come" ideology. Perhaps not so much consciously, but when I read McNeal's words I am reminded by the tweaks and twinges of pain/guilt I feel inside. A part of me wants to be that dynamic speaker/teacher/leader who is looked at and seen as influential and important, who draws folks in and inspires them, I guess the pride in me runs pretty deep. The reality is that the more I try to become this great "leader", the less influence I seem to have on the folks around me. It's only as I enter into relationships, only when I walk beside, that I get a chance to have meaningful conversations about real things with real people, only then do I feel God working through me. Not sure if I fully understand this or even believe it all the time, again, the pride in me still calls out for more. But maybe as I continue to read, as I seek the Lord, as I talk with people, God will continue to show me.
I have been reading a book lately entitled This Present Future by a guy named Reggie McNeal. He talks about the shift from a comsumer church to a missional church. He challenges much of what the institutional church has prescribed to, a "if you build it they will come" mentality, which he argues pulls us further away not closer towards God's kingdom work. In fact he states that this model of church will die over the course of the next 20 years or so, and so to will the institutional church, if we don't make some serious changes.
Lately I have been feeling God working on my heart when it comes to some of these issues. A part of my faith has long been tied to the "do church really well and folks will come" ideology. Perhaps not so much consciously, but when I read McNeal's words I am reminded by the tweaks and twinges of pain/guilt I feel inside. A part of me wants to be that dynamic speaker/teacher/leader who is looked at and seen as influential and important, who draws folks in and inspires them, I guess the pride in me runs pretty deep. The reality is that the more I try to become this great "leader", the less influence I seem to have on the folks around me. It's only as I enter into relationships, only when I walk beside, that I get a chance to have meaningful conversations about real things with real people, only then do I feel God working through me. Not sure if I fully understand this or even believe it all the time, again, the pride in me still calls out for more. But maybe as I continue to read, as I seek the Lord, as I talk with people, God will continue to show me.
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